I'm Bored

Troublemakers should never be bored.

BUT

So something I struggle with now is being bored, a lot. Things that used to entertain me no longer do because I don't get the same rush I used to.

I mean, i need new entertainment, new activity, new 'assignment' or whatever you want to call it. Just something that will cure this boring life that i have now. It's only January so i should not complain instead i have to get my action somewhere.
I hold myself back in some ways because I know myself too well, and if I like something I might like it to excess and i do have fear-based decision-making. It is so not awesome but letting go isn't always easy. I like to say "What's the worst that could happen?!" and just go for whatever i want to do. i wish i have that courage.

I'd love to travel more. Go hiking and diving. Hip hop or Latin dance lessons. Car racing, drifting or at least Go-cart. Read more meaningful and interesting books. Hang out more with friends. Expand my networking.
Yes, I have started to register for a marathon and volunteering at home i.e learn how to cook, slowly. I plan to do this more and get out of my comfort zone. I want to take more chances, but I make a lot of excuses. I know that...hehe

What I want more than anything is to have experiences, and in this case I need to be my own rainmaker. Not an easy task but literally i already am..hahaha

I want to be bad. It's more fun.

Nemo

Tell me why i feel this way now..

My Webcam Story

I have a webcam now ..woohooo…
So the 1st thing I did is of course thank the person who gave it to me..=P

Day 1
Install it in my computer. Try it with a friend and I am so happy when he can see me. Mission accomplished and I went to bed happily.

Day 2
Still excited about it, I video call my friends in msn. Tadaaa…she can see me too and we keep playing with it. Suddenly I heard this loud sound. Oh, it’s the sound of my lappy fan. As usual, ignore it and continue chatting. The sounds become louder and louder calling for a help. Still ignore it..
Guess what, lappy hang so does my face and it’s not a very pretty expression too.. so I start to be the IT girl. Click here and there. Realizing that I actually make it worse, I stopped and text my friend, told her that my lappy hang and we will continue later or the next day. She replied that she knew about it because she can see my ugly expression stop there. = . =’
So I off the lappy and went to bed.

Day 3
Still not giving up, I video call another friend. And this time I don’t know what I click until my face become so big. I zoomed my own face and I don’t know how to un-zoom it. :’(
So we chatted with my huge face there for a while before I heard the same loud sound again. I knew very well that later lappy will hang but I choose not to care and continue not for long before lappy hang AGAIN. Doing the same routine, I text my friend about it. I off the webcam application and unplugged it, after a while, lappy back to normal. I continue my work and went to bed. Not very happy.

Day4
I on my webcam again and just like the previous day I heard that loud ugly sounds. However, today is a little bit different because instead of it hang, lappy went completely off. My screen become black with no sound at all..kapoofff~!!
I froze there and scare to death. I press the on button again but nothing happen. Not yet panic, I tried again. still can’t. SHIT!!!!!!
Maybe I need to wait for a while for it to cool off. So I waited.
Tick tock tick tock…
I on again..still nothing. Arghh…
My panic level increase but acting calm I went to bed.

Day5
Went back home from office and saw my brother is using the lappy… fuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh~!!!!
No more webcam experiment today and until I upgrade my RAM..hopefully soon..

'productive weekend'

1 Japanese series with 11 episodes + 3 movies + 1 magazine + update the blog = 'productive weekend'...hahaha

i need to do book shopping before the long holidays soon.. any volunteer? =P

Quarter of Century

OK...its 2011... quarter of century..=P

i was trying my hard on the last day of 2010 to write about my year and what to expect on 2011. But to be honest, i don't know how to start and i couldn't even find a 2011 song... haizzz

So many thing happened to me last year and its always gonna be a year to be remember because i lost my beloved grandmother who passed away in November 2010. i was so closed with her as she stayed with my family for the longest time. she took care of me when i was a baby and she watched me grow up. She was a great women and i will always love and miss her for the rest of my life.

2010 also thought me something important that sometimes you learn valuable lessons at the most unexpected times and places.

All of us make mistakes in life and trust me,I have made my share too. We can either forget it; try to push it away from our memories, hoping that someday we completely forget about it or we can embrace it and actually learn something out of it. It is of course easier said than done. But sometimes I do believe that the best way to learn from our mistakes is to carry it with you so that every time you have a chance to be at the same or similar situation again, you will be automatically reminded about it and hopefully can make a better judgment now. however, someone that i know once told me that its not fair to judge a new similar situation alike because it may have different taste and flavor in it. And we never know what and where we end up to.

When we were a kid, we’ve been told that life is either bad or good. Well, at least this is what I believe. But as I grew older, I realize that life is not as simple as what is right and what is wrong. As more and more events happened in my life, I realize that there are many areas in life that are grey. And we need to learn how to deal with this grey area so that we will not be stuck in that area forever.

I guess what really matters, is the impression you left on people’s minds as a person.

2011 is the year that i know will change me to be better. i will make sure it will. I have plans for this year and i hope to achieve all of that. what i need to learn now is how to go for what i want and what i believe in without fear. i need to be strong and grab any opportunity that can lead me to where i want to be without compromising with my belief and faith. I should not care what people want to say or judge me because i am the one who will live my life. And i want to live it well and with no regret. i need to be surrounding with people who can dig out my true potential and actually give me the opportunity to shine. And if this year i can find someone who can share the ups and downs, understanding, supportive, and just accept and love each other for who they are, its gonna be a great bonus =)