Self Discovery #3 - Say Goodbye

Finally i have time to update my blog after so long.. Been busy with my life and sometimes buat2 busy..haha
Anyway,its so easy to be taken for granted and sometimes its so easy to be fooled in a relationship,in general, with friends and family.
Sometimes, i tend to be true and honest with a person,share all that i have,financially as well as emotionally, but later when i learn that they dont reciprocate in the same mannner and just walked away after get what they want and usually at the time when i need them the most, it hurts. Probably they feel i am not close enough to them or its me who stupid to trust them. i hate being used by other people for any reason at all especially by someone i trust.
im tired of being bangang girl, but according to someone i will always be. =.='

After my long vacation to a special place *thanks to someone who bring me there =)* i realize that one of my bangang-ness moment is when having a second thought between 'cry' and 'say goodbye'..haha of course it will be 'say goodbye'.. i just wanna forgive and forget about everything.. by thinking of 'cry' means i still have a bit of anger and frustration in me.. but i dun want to have such negative feelings.. i wanna live my life without any regrets and without anything that will be the wall of my bright and happy future.. semua yg berlaku ada hikmah nya.. lagipun semua yang jadi ni salah sendiri..so pandai2 lah tanggung kan..haha

besides all that, i did say goodbye to few other things.. let see...

1) say goodbye to the old style of vacation..haha *i dah promise someone to not write it in detail..i wish i can write it in detail..hahaha*
2) say goodbye to my hair.. i cut my hair..=)
3) say goodbye to my clean record of no accident with Ginger... Ginger had her 1st accident.. the scariest moment of my life yet.. an experience that i hope that i will never go thru again.. poor ginger.. i am so sorry.. =( promise will take care of you and drive you safely in future..
4) say goodbye to my old life..the stupid/evil/kind girl i used to be.. i maybe still bangang but i want to be bangang at the right time.. (macam lah boleh control..haha)and most important is i want to be a nice smart girl who know what she want in her life, work hard for it, tak kacau orang, and sentiasa jadi diri sendiri.
5) say goodbye to my old plan/goal.. not totally change but new amendment with a little twist.. will be new challenge..or shud i said it will be a BIG challenge for me..

Other thing that i might will say goodbye is my job..still uncertain..but if really happen, i will move to new city and back to be independent..huhu
but im not sure whether i want to move or not...haizzzz
so many thing to risk and this will definitely affect my new goal.. and if i move, adjusting to new environment during world cup season?? hmmm... not sure i can say goodbye to world cup..:P